The importance of
managing emotions
At this stage of our lives, we may find our pace slowing down. There may nonetheless be transitions that we are experiencing. These may include adjusting to less active professional roles, or dealing with health concerns as our bodies undergo physical changes.
The new routines and habits of this stage of our lives can be overwhelming. These feelings could lead to intense emotions that can affect us. We can learn to become aware of our emotions and to understand them.
When we can manage our emotions better, we will be able to take care of our well-being and continue enjoying a life filled with meaningful and rewarding activities.
What are emotions
and why do we feel them?
We all experience emotions as a normal and important part of our lives.
Emotions are
information
They help us know how to respond properly to circumstances we are in and frame what we make of the situation.
It’s normal to feel
all kinds of emotions
All emotions have their functions.
Experiencing the full range of emotions adds meaning to our lives and helps us to handle challenges.
6 basic emotions
There is a wide range of emotions. However, there are generally 6 basic emotions, which are experienced by everyone:
An emotional state
leading to feelings of
strong annoyance and
frustration
A strong emotion that
results in the feeling of
great dislike
A primal emotion that is
important to survival
which triggers a fight or
flight response
A pleasant emotional state
that brings out feelings of
joy, contentment, and satisfaction
An emotional state
characterised by feelings
of disappointment, grief
or hopelessness
A brief emotional state,
either positive or
negative, following
something unexpected
Why is it important to understand
and manage our emotions?
Emotions affect how we think, behave, and respond to situations and relationships. Although emotions are instinctive and natural things, they can sometimes be intense and overwhelming. That’s why we can all benefit from understanding and managing our emotions healthily.
Watch this video to see why it’s important to acknowledge and manage our emotions as they arise.
How do we manage our emotions?
- Practice noticing and identifying our emotions by using the feelings tracker to identify how we are feeling.
- Avoid brushing away or pretending not to have certain emotions as we might get overwhelmed and become less effective at managing them. Our feelings are there to help us make sense of what’s going on!
- Check in with our body too. We may also feel some body sensations with certain emotions – perhaps our face gets hot and muscles tense up.
- Accept all our emotions as natural and not something to avoid. Try to understand and figure out what happened that got us feeling this way.
- Our emotions can arise from many things. It could be from events, situations, or even our thoughts or memories.
- Knowing what brought about that feeling and why we felt that way would also make it easier for us to have a better grip and assess on how best to manage our feelings.
- Regardless of whether things are really as bad as they seem, unhelpful thinking patterns may make a situation seem more negative than it actually is. For example, we may overgeneralise and think, “nothing good will happen to me”.
- When we have such negative thoughts, we can use My Positivity Guide to reframe such thoughts by focusing on the good things around us.
- Shred away these unhelpful thinking patterns using the Emotions Explorer.
- Think about the best way to express our emotion or regulate them, so we can feel better. For example, would it feel more helpful to gently confront someone or work off the feeling by going for a brisk walk?
- Consider doing more of the things we enjoy, such as spending time in nature, listening to music or even sleeping. We can also try exercising as it has mood-boosting effects and relieves stress.
- Learn relaxation skills such as:
- Pick up deep breathing exercises as a method of relaxation.
- Practising progressive muscle relaxation where we tense a group of muscles as we breathe in and relax them as we breathe out.
- Using guided imagery where, for example, we imagine ourselves at the beach feeling the warm breeze on our skin.
- Considering mindfulness where we slow down our racing thoughts and be aware of our body and mind.
How do we talk about our emotions?
Talking to others about our emotions can also help us explore new perspectives and understand our thinking patterns.
This someone can be a friend, a child or a neighbour we are close to. We can go up to this trusted person and ask, “Can we talk for a minute? I have something to share.” We can then share how we feel, and why. We may just find ourselves surprised that someone can help us feel better and assure us that we are not alone.
We don’t need to delay until a problem becomes big or wait for a special time to talk about it. It’s good to practise talking about our problems, as it allows us to be aware of issues as they develop.
Some of us may not be comfortable talking about our problems with others, especially with people outside the family, so we may need a little time to get used to it. We could also chat with a neighbour while working at the community garden, or invite some friends out for coffee.
We don’t have to talk about every feeling we have, but we can take note of our feelings, say how we feel, and why. Learning to do so is a good habit to develop, and it will get easier with practice. It is also okay to not understand why we are feeling certain emotions. We can still say something like, “I feel angry but I don’t know why.”
The more we talk about it, the easier it gets. It not only helps us understand ourselves, but also increases the connection between us and the people who matter to us.
